Twinkle Twinkle

I hung Christmas lights on my house this year for the first time. One unseasonably warm day in November, I got a bug up my butt to hang lights. I have always loved driving around at night and seeing all the brilliant twinkly lights. I thought, "We must have those too."

So I spent the afternoon going up and down the ladder so much that I realized I don't use my butt muscles that much. (Going up and down the stairs the next day was quite the treat)

I attached the little clips the specified 6" apart on the shingles of the roof. I ran the icicle lights through the slots and dutifully backtracked to straighten out said lights so that they all hung down beautifully.

I made a run to the local mass merchant to get more extension cords. I decided against getting a timer because really, what lazy person cannot plug in their lights? Oh and I just happened to pick up 6 more boxes of twinkles.

I made sure that my extension cords were hidden from view. I wrapped and re-wrapped those 6 new strings of lights around bushes and miniature Christmas trees. I even unearthed from the bowels of the garage a hideous yet endearing plastic Santa that LIT UP!

I was so pleased with my accomplishment. I envisioned how beautiful my house would look to others driving by at night. How they would point and say, "How pretty." or "Ohhhhh, look."

Did I happened to mention about not getting the timer? And how I thought people who bought those where lazy and I felt very smug for saving my $20 for something else?

Ask me how many times my house has been pointed at because it looks so lovely with the lights aglow? Ask me how many nights those lights have actually been on? I wouldn't need all five fingers to show you.

Hello nice to meet you, I'm LAZY!!!!

All that work and those lights have been plugged in a handful of times. (Yeah, that's pushing it) And now it's a sure bet that when it comes time to take 600 hundred feet of lights down, it isn't going to be unseasonably warm. I'll be lucky if it is above zero out.

Hmmm, I wonder if I could be that neighbor that never takes down their lights............because hey, I'M LAZY!!